Friday, October 17, 2008

Death's Gift

Georgia Weithe, author of "Shining Moments: Finding Hope in Facing Death," talks about death bringing gifts. At first, I have to admit, when Jeff died I didn't want to think there was a gift in any of it. But if you really think about it, there is. What was mine? Well, independence, and not in the way you think. Jeff believed in me, never stopped me from doing something I wanted to try and although I've had other boyfriends prior to when I met Jeff, they were either intimidated because I had a brain or they didn't care less about my desire to be a writer. Jeff was different. He was my support, my cheerleader. I was even told from the aide in the hospital that visited Jeff that he talked a lot about the kids and me and my career.

How is that a gift? Well, I know I can handle anything because that lives on with me. I've been through so much, but taking Jeff away made me have to stand up and realize that I can do it all because my cheerleader made me believe that. Here's Georgia's blurb for this website from her book. What's your gift?

Death’s Gift

Ten years ago death took my father, but it gave me an important gift. It showed me that we take much for granted in life, because we assume there will always be another day to pay attention to the beauty around us, or to alter or elevate the quality of our relationships with those we love. The illusion that life on earth never ends allows us to pretend we can continue as we are forever.

The gift that death has to offer is the awareness that all pleasure is finite, all beauty is transient, as well as the knowledge that we will not be here forever to work through our problems with others.

Here are ten things death taught me about how to live:

1. Live your life so you have no regrets.

2. Admit to yourself that life is fleeting and all things as we know them will come to an end; then out of the awareness of the endings, create new beginnings.

3. Begin to heal your life by making choices that allow you to control your own destiny.

4. Acknowledge the presence of those you love, and honor your spouse or partner, your children and your friends.

5. Never resort to violent acts or bring ruthless thoughts into the realm of your being.

6. Bring love into every situation and replace vengeance with peaceful, loving intentions.

7. Elevate your actions to reflect the highest principles of living; show love, respect and honor for all life.

8. Waste no energy on vanity or pride.

9. Be generous and giving and pursue the highest purpose in all you do

10. Let go of life in the sweetest way you know how.

Georgia Weithe is the author of Shining Moments: Finding Hope in Facing Death (Reflections Press, September 2008). To read excerpts, find additional resources, or to join the conversation on her blog visit,

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