Monday, September 22, 2008

If you live in or near New York City, and stepping out of your box

Wow. I just didn't step out of my box yesterday, I jumped out. Face it, when our spouses die, our life is completely different -- friendships and families change and we often put ourselves in a box, trying to be kept safe from the world. At times, I like my box -- I just do what I do -- pretty much the same stuff I do all the time. But being a true Gemini that I am (hey, if you're into astrology, although I'm not but I know my sign, you'll know what I mean) at times I have to step out of that box, do something different. At times, I'd like to throw the box away, but for me, it's nice to know it's there when I need it.

So what did I do? I went to a television and film expo in New York City. I always wanted to be a screenwriter -- it's what I studied in college, but life took me down the road of print journalism and then life took a huge twist and dumped me on a totally different road. Now that the kids are getting older and they know my dream, I am 'trying' to get back to it. But the industry has changed and I felt lost. So the expo was there for me to ask questions. That's not the 'jumping out of the box' part. I'll let you in on a little secret -- I've always wanted to be an actor -- just as an extra in a few movies, nothing big. So I actually put my headshot up on "headshot lane" where others can see it. It was in a line of other actors/actresses who had so many credits they needed a second sheet. Me? I only was on television/radio for promotion of my books.

You should have seen me. I was going to chicken out, but I didn't. I did it. I left it there and walked away, going to the seminars and when someone said, "Are you an actor?" (it was on my name card along with "writer") I proudly said, "yes," because it's what I want to be and it's important to put it out there so it happens.

I was excited. I did something toward a dream. We get stuck in our boxes in this new life. Promise me that today you'll step out even just a little bit. Plan a trip, go on a hike when you've never done it before, look for that new job -- something. You'll feel a little better. Trust me.

If you live in or near New York City

Please join Anne Roiphe in a discussion about her book EPILOGUE, about the transition from a woman married to a woman set suddenly adrift. Whether by death or divorce, the end of an intimate relationship is the beginning of a long and difficult journey. You don't have to take it alone.

Where: Barnes & Noble on 83rd and Broadway
When: Wednesday, September 24th
Time: 7:00 pm

Critical acclaim: "...raw, painful and yet occasionally comic memoir of the year and a half following the sudden death of her husband...Roiphe's goal is to detail the bereaved person's efforts to restore the rhythms of a normal, everyday existence after the loss of a spouse..." - The New York Times Book Review

"After her husband's sudden death, Anne Roiphe, nearing 70 had to remake not only her life but her self. Her willingness to expose her uncertainties is brave and moving." - The Boston Globe

"In this deeply honest memoir, Roiphe unabashedly describes her unexpected new life as a widow...Written in a brief, simple style reminiscent of a personal grueling it is to grieve the loss of a loved grief usually abates, occasionally heals, and sometimes moves us fragile humans to a new, previously unimagined place." - The Philadelphia Inquirer

"In poignant flashes of everyday moments and memories, Roiphe tells an unflinching and unsentimental story of widowhood's stupefying disquiet, of surviving love and living on". - Publishers Weekly starred review

"No one can really prepare a woman for this passage in life, but Roiphe's luminous memoir is a beacon of help and, ultimately, hope." - Booklist


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